Hey Everybody in Portland Computer Repair Land,

I am, for once, actually going to continue a series I promise to continue. We started last time with the topic – the idea of being condescending. I am going to stay on topic, but stray from narrative form, by taking this opportunity to give you all an example from my own life of how difficult it can be to avoid being condescending.

First, I need to start by saying that I own a bike, it’s a 1960-something Schwinn I got from a friend. It has a problem, the fenders have rusted and flattened at the bottom, so it’s impossible to  fully inflate the tires without them wearing against the bottom of the fender. I took my bike to my local bike shop, explained the problem, and told the mechanic that I would like to have the fenders replaced.

Now I am going to diverge and tell this story twice, one from my perspective, and once from his -

The mechanic told me that he thought it would be too expensive to replace them, and that we could try to just bend them back into shape. I asked how much it would cost to replace them, and he assured me it was very expensive and not a good idea. I asked him to humor me, and get the price. He looked it up and told me it would cost about $80 to replace both with manufactured originals, or $35 to replace with black plastic. He then informed me that plastic would be a better idea, because metal would just rust and bend again, and plastic would hold its shape; thus, if I wanted to replace them I should use plastic. He then started over, reiterating his point that it was a bad idea to begin with, and I should just deal with them. Finally I gave up, I asked him for a brake adjustment I needed, which he did, quickly and efficiently, and I left. I was extremely frustrated with the entire situation, I wanted my damn fenders replaced, I thought $80 was a fine price to pay, and that condescending know it all mechanic wouldn’t let me just make that choice without feeling like an idiot.

I would now like to tell the story again, this time as I can imagine the mechanic may have written in his own blog -

Today a guy came in with a really old, rusty bike worth maybe $50. The gears didn’t change correctly, the front wheel was dented and really needed to be replaced, and the thing weighed more than a small car. He started going on about how what he wanted was new fenders. I tried to explain to him that the fenders cost more than the bike is worth and then a good whack with a wrench would probably solve the problem. He kept insisting on new fenders, so I suggested plastic, way cheaper, would reduce the weight of the thing by 5 pounds, and would last much longer. He kept trying to insist so I tried to explain again, obviously he just did not understand me. Finally he realized I was right, got his brakes adjusted, and rode off. I am very glad I stopped him from making a poor decision with his money.

Tomorrow I’ll come back to talk about how we ended out in a situation where the customer is unhappy despite the technician doing his best.

Hey Everybody in Portland Computer Repair Land,

For me, this blog exists so I can tell you things that I hope you will find interesting. Also to give my parents a way to snoop on me without having to call me and ask, “So, how are you?”

The topic I’m going to address the next week or so will probably be the most difficult I’ve ever tried to form a coherent blog about, because everybody on earth has a completely different perspective on the issue. This one word carries an enormous weight in the minds of every customer, and every employee, and yet people spill its blood far too willingly and frequently, without regard to the value of it.

I am going to write a few posts this week about one, single, difficult word -

Condescending.

I am going to start by telling you a few of the reasons that various customers have called me or a staff member by The Word in the past year -

1. Talking too quickly.

“I could barely understand what he said!”

2. Talking too slowly.

“What am I, an idiot?”

3. Asking too many questions.

“You’re the computer person, why are you asking me what happened?”

4. Not asking enough questions.

“It worried me that they didn’t ask me about all the background of the computer, isn’t that important to figuring out what happened?”

5. Making too many suggestions.

“Why are you giving me so many choices? You’re the computer guy, you tell me what I need!”

6. Not making enough suggestions.

“Wait, why didn’t you ask about X option? My brother in law said I should do X!”

7. Working too quickly

“I couldn’t even see what he was doing!”

8. Working too slowly

“I don’t want you to show me, just fix it!”

In the next few posts I’m going to talk a bit about the extraordinary difficulty of this problem, and what we do to try to avoid it.

Hey Everybody in Portland Computer Repair Land,

Don’t be surprised if you come into the shop and find everything moved around again. The angel of re-arranging furniture struck the shop over the weekend, and we’ve put things in new places. First we added a second layer to our work area to allow us to work on more machines at once, back and forth rapid-fire style, and then we flipped our front entry bench to face the door. For a long time I’ve been opposed to having a person “behind a desk” as I think it’s unfriendly and offputting, but a customer recently pointed out that in our current orientation, everybody has their backs to the door! So, in order to facilitate actually looking at customers, my desk now faces the front door.

So, when you come in, you will now have my smiling face to greet you, even if it is behind a desk. (Don’t worry, I promise to come out and greet you).

Thanks!

-Zac

Owner

Happy Hamster Portland Computer Repair

Hey Everybody in Portland Computer Repair Land,

Something to be aware of, if you haven’t bought a computer in the last 4/5 years, is that new computers have become crap breeding grounds. If you buy a new laptop today, you will find when you turn it on that it’s covered in “free” programs and “30 day trials!” of this that and the other, much like the side of your average city bus. You thought you paid hundreds of dollars for a computer, but in actuality you just paid hundreds of dollars so advertisers of computer products could throw themselves at you.
Luckily, there is a better option! If you buy your laptop here at Happy Hamster, we don’t just unload all the crap, we actually take some TNT and blow up your hard drive, and then reinstall the operation system *from scratch* that way there are no unwanted programs, no 30 day free trials, no spyware or spamware, and nothing else to slow your computer down!

So the next time you’re shopping for a laptop, keep us in mind, we work for you, not for HP or Dell, so we sell the computers you want with the features you actually need.

Thanks!

-Zac

Hey everybody in Portland Computer Repair Land,

As an experiment to help make it easier for people to find our store, Happy Hamster has hired our first sign spinner!  Levi is a budding sales guy working on building his own online business, and as a sideline he’ll be standing by our store from noon – 6 PM on Monday’s and Friday’s.

Come by and wave, honk your horn, or say hi as you pass us by the next time you’re on MLK.

Thanks everybody,

-Zac

Owner

Happy Hamster Portland Computer Repair